I recently read Marek Tamm's opinion article asking the curious question: "Is it possible to become an Estonian?" I thought to myself — well, of course it is! I have myself become an Estonian at heart like many other people who have moved to Estonia from abroad or who were even born in Estonia. We have learned the language, participate fully in and contribute greatly to Estonian society, have Estonian friends, understand the essence of local culture — we love Estonia and we feel Estonian. However, we are still not considered Estonians by many. Why?

Marek Tamm's article was a response to Tiiu Hallap's commentary "The Estonian and the Tuareg." Hallap's conclusion is basically that to be Estonian, you need to be born and raised in an Estonian environment. Like Marek Tamm, I find this argument to be faulty, despite understanding very well that Estonian language has served as a protective layer for this nation and its identity over centuries of oppression. I was not born in Estonia, but I understand Estonia and Estonians well — so well even, that it's hard for me to put it into words. Who is to say what level or extent of "tacit knowledge" about Estonia is enough to make you Estonian? Is national identity only granted at birth, like the connection with your biological parents? Or is it possible to be adopted by another nationality? Do we — the ones who were not raised in an Estonian environment, but still feel Estonian — stay forever "almost Estonians" or do we get the chance to become "new-Estonians"?

During my time abroad I have discovered fundamental differences in how countries perceive the ideas of citizenship and nationality. In Estonia, citizenship is given to children born here through bloodlines — the parental heritage. In the United States, everybody born there automatically receives citizenship and can have dual citizenship. Owning a U.S. passport makes you American. In Estonia, ethnicity makes you Estonian.

I was born in the United States but have lived in Europe for around seventeen years, almost nine years in Estonia. I started learning Estonian in 2010 when I attended an intensive language course at the University of Tartu Summer School. Today, sixteen years later, I speak fluent Estonian. Locals are surprised when they hear me speak. Almost without fail, their first reaction is: "How did you learn such good Estonian!? I know people who have lived here for decades and speak almost no Estonian."

The short answer to their question: time, dedication and proper motivation. "Where there's a will, there's a way." There are no "magic tricks" or "get-rich-quick" schemes for properly learning a language.

While language learning is primarily about desire to learn and dedication, the environment in which you grow up also has a huge effect. In recent years, the topic of Estonian language transition of schools has been rightfully and actively brought up in the media. I fully support this social initiative. If children are attending Estonian language schools, they will learn Estonian and things will go a lot better for them in the future in an Estonian-speaking society. But this cannot be forced onto people, there must be an appropriate incentive. They must feel accepted as Estonians once they have learned the language.

Being a fully functioning part of society requires speaking the local language. Living in a place where you don't understand the language complicates daily operational matters and can leave you feeling confused about the reasons behind the thinking of local society. That all contributes to you not feeling at home as well as having difficulty making friends and finding a job. It prevents and restricts proper integration into society.

Only understanding the language at a deep level enables you to fully comprehend the essence of Estonians and their culture. So, this is a clear precondition of becoming an Estonian. It is part of the tacit knowledge about Estonians that even those who were not born in Estonia can indeed gain. While my Estonian is very good, it's not perfect. But it's already enough to make me feel like I'm an Estonian.

I came to Estonia for the first time in 2009. Since then, I have come to know Estonia and Estonians very well. I have read countless books about Estonia and Estonian history. I have experienced the change in seasons many times. I've seen warm winters, cold winters. I've shoveled snow for hours. I've celebrated the summer solstice many times with Estonians, by the bonfire, in the sauna. I've washed myself in the sauna with lake water using weird old metal bowls. I have been to Estonian weddings, funerals and birthdays. I know Estonian music very well, from pop to folk to metal. I've been to various music festivals in Estonia. I've seen most of the classic Estonian movies. I've attended a live show on ERR and danced in front of the stage where Ivo Linna was performing. I won the morning trivia game on RockFM Radio. I've been to the Song and Dance Festival three times. I've frozen my ass off at the Independence Day Parade. I've watched the penguins march and listened intently to the President on New Years Eve. I've traveled to every corner of Estonia. I've climbed the oil shale ash hills of Eastern Estonia. I've taught classes to Estonian schoolchildren as part of the Back to School program. I've colored eggs on Easter using onion peels and other natural ingredients. I've spent countless hours in the country with my adopted Estonian family, at first sitting and listening, not understanding a word, now, fully involved in the conversation. I've dabbled in Võro language. I've worn vodka socks. I've planted potatoes, harvested garlic, made potato salad and garlic bread. I've gathered berries and apples from my garden and made juice. Every year in the spring I order wood and stack it for drying in preparation for heating my home in the winter. I eat blood sausage and sauerkraut at Christmas before going to the cemetery. I've complained about the weather. I almost got to vote in the 2025 local elections.

These bits and pieces are just part of my everyday life here in Estonia. They are the undercurrent of conversations, daily jokes and unwritten laws and traditions which I have come to know and love now that I can participate in them.

All these experiences, combined with the deep understanding I've gained over almost twenty years about Estonian people, culture, language and history, have given me knowledge about Estonia that is bigger than I realize and hard to express in words. This is the "tacit knowledge" that Tiiu Hallap sets as the criterion for being Estonian. Am I not an Estonian?

For many years, Estonian politicians, journalists and citizens have been talking about the full integration into Estonian society of those who have grown up in a non-Estonian-speaking environment. Before that can happen and if Estonians really want it to happen, we should reconsider what exactly it means to be Estonian. I feel like I'm already a member of this small, but special club, but will Estonians accept me as a new-Estonian?

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